Multiplicity

By:  Staci Stallings

Here’s the problem with society today.  (Okay, maybe I’m making it a problem… or maybe not.)

Let’s say you join an organization.  Or let’s say your child does.  Let’s say that organization is a school.  And for the fun of it, let’s say that school is private so not only do you have tuition to come up with, but you have fundraisers also–several of them.

Fundraisers are of course a double-edged sword.  Yes.  They help the school run.  Yes, they help keep tuition down.  BUT the bigger the fundraiser, the more effort someone has to put into it.

Now, let’s say that you don’t have one child, you have three–in two different schools.

You might think that you multiply your time/effort outgo by 2 (i.e. two schools), but you would be wrong.  You actually multiply it by 3, because each child’s CLASS is responsible for supporting the fundraiser, not just each family.

So, now we’ve got 3 fundraisers for each school per year, times 3 kids.  That’s a factor of 9.

BUT… each kid also has class projects and fundraisers, so it’s not a multiple of 3 but of say 5.  Now we’re up to 15.

Of course, all your kids do is not just fundraisers, so let’s add in multiples of 5 for each child of homework and daily chores you must oversee.  Then, of course, there are extra-curricular things like track, gymnastics, and art.  So, 3 X 5 X 3.  That’s 45.

You also have to keep them healthy, which requires at minimum teeth cleaning and at least a couple trips to the doctor each year.  Add in Christmas, Easter, and birthdays.

We’re now getting somewhat close to multiplicity with the kids.  Oh, except we forgot church things like Sunday School, sacraments, and Vacation Bible School.  And summer projects like photography, drums, and gymnastics.  OH, and did I forget one of them is learning to drive?  Yeah, so add in some hours on the road, studying, and getting all paperwork in order.

That’s the baseline of what I do.  Then there’s being the play director for VBS, teaching Sunday School, running two businesses, cleaning house, doing laundry, running people here, there, and everywhere.  Keeping husband going.  Scheduling time with both extended families and keeping up with them.  Writing books and articles.  Marketing.  Groceries.  Bills in.  Bills out.  Bookkeeping….

Did I mention that both schools have now decided to do their Spring Fundraisers and want me to help, and that I’m getting ready (already) for the fundraiser for the two in the fall…

There must be an Algebraic term for multiplicity times something.

I think it’s either called Life or Motherhood, or maybe (Life X Motherhood).  Wonder what that equals?  Any suggestions?

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